This interview has been condensed and edited from its original form. 

SBC: What is your favorite Center School game? 

JD: Favorite Center School game… I love a little All School Capture the Flag. I love playing games with the older kids and the younger kids. I also like Sardines. 

SBC: What about your favorite birthday song? 

JD:  Candles. No doubt, always choose Candles. Love it. 

SBC: Favorite ritual. 

JD: I love All School. All School is like church. I love all the little kids sharing. I love how when the kids are little, it's like going to a Broadway show. 

SBC: I know. 

JD: They're so into it. They're so obsessed. And now it's just one of those things where our kids when they leave here are so good at public speaking and so good at presenting… you know, my [8th grade class] just did their AP [Ambitious Project] speeches for AP night on Tuesday. It was unreal how good they were. They were so confident, just calm, just up there like better than most adults for sure. So, I love me some All School. 

SBC: And how do you describe the school to people? 

JD: I describe it as small and progressive. A family, which I know is a very loaded term these days. I think a lot of people like to kind of put a boundary around the work/family kind of conversation. And I understand that. But for me, it actually is my family, because my actual children are here. 

SBC: What’s your role here? 

JD: I am the eighth grade lead teacher and an Uppers teacher, which is... Uppers is the Center School word for the middle school [grades 6-8].

SBC: And how long have you been in this role?

JD: I believe this to be my 11th year. 

SBC: And have you always been an Uppers teacher? 

JD: Yes, I came from teaching high school, so… eighth grade is where I belong here at the school. 

SBC: So tell me why. Like what is it about that age range?

JD: Eighth graders are... they're awesome, because they're a great mix of still being kids, they still like to play and do kid things but they're starting to try on other identities and the world is getting bigger for them. They're trying to figure out where they belong in the world and I love that moment with them. 

SBC:  And when you are with them during the day, what do you think they're looking to you for? 

JD: I think they're looking to me for affirmation that they're okay. They're looking for me for safety, because a lot of what we do here involves taking risks and being vulnerable. And that's really hard for adolescents. That's really, really hard. It's easier for sixth graders than it is for eighth graders. It's one of the things that they come in with. Less self-conscious and then we kind of see them gain self-consciousness. And that gets in the way of community, it gets in the way of learning. And so I think they look to me for interpersonal safety with them, but to also kind of create a safe environment with our class. 

SBC: So how do you do that? Like what would you say are essential components to facilitating that safe space and connection both between teacher and student and between students?

JD: I think a lot of it is modeling, right? I put myself out there a lot. I, you know, make a fool out of myself or tell them a lot of stories about what I was like when I was their age, which I think they enjoy and helps them have a good laugh. Like if everybody can have a laugh at me, who doesn't feel vulnerable because I'm 52, you know, then, then they can kind of know that, it's okay to laugh at each other in a nice way... I try to make things fun and have the kids enjoy what we're doing. I think I really listen to them and I remember things well.

So I'll often bring up something that somebody shared in morning meeting, like later in the day. Or, you know, the group I have this year is especially really good at kind of listening to each other and asking follow-up questions and making everybody's stories part of the fabric. 

SBC: Some of my friends I've had for 40 years and I met them at the Center School. I think part of that is because we all practiced building community and connecting and asking questions before we knew the answers.

JD: Yeah, I think that it's so ingrained in, you know, all the little things. Like when I think about what you just said, it really sparked for me. There's a tradition of when you're done presenting anything at Center School, whether it's at All School or you're just like in a circle sharing something, you say, “I'm ready for questions and comments.” Which we do in my family, because both my kids, one of my kids graduated last year, and one of them is graduating this year. And it's just like a thing. You do it no matter what. You're always ready to receive questions or get feedback. So that's a little piece that I always think of and it's not normal at other schools. Most schools, it's like you do things for the teacher, you want the teacher's approval, everybody else, whatever, they're just other people in the room. But that's not, yeah, that's not what we're doing here.

SBC: What are you doing here? Like what feels like specific to what's being done here that makes it this place?

JD: What we're doing here is helping kids figure out who they are. We're helping kids to figure out what's important to them. We're helping kids figure out how they learn, what they want to learn, and then how to do it, how they learn best. We're helping kids figure out how to be part of a community, be part of a group. 

They talk about community in the younger grades and building a community in their classroom. And we talk about that very explicitly in the Uppers, but then we're also going out into the larger community. And we talk a lot about, you know, the world at large and how we want to be in the world. 

A watercolor portrait of Josie by Maren Bishop ‘25, a member of Josie’s latest 8th grade homeroom.

Vanessa takes kids out for community service. I mean, we do community service in the school, but she's also taking kids to nursing homes to help out in all sorts of different ways. There's always an idea of giving back and being a part of something… we’ll do a day of service and go scoop all the wood chips or do a job that takes a lot of hands and it’s just built in. And writing thank you cards. That was something, a really small thing, when I first got here that was a big piece of the culture. That was totally different from anywhere I had been, where we take time for writing thank you cards for the parents who've driven us places or write a thank you to a speaker who's come in. Doing these little tasks that kind of build gratitude and like really explicitly show a kid where they fit in the community.

…And I just think in general, the inclusiveness and the tone… the kids know that it's not just a teacher's job, it's their job too. To build a community, to include other kids, to be as open and loving as they can. But what we often hear from teachers or from parents when they go off to high school is, kids who graduate from here know what their job is as part of a classroom community. Right there, always communicating with the teacher, asking for help, trying to keep in mind the whole group. They just know how to do it really well, which is cool. 

SBC: That's like the rewarding thing that you hear back?

JD: Yes. We hear a lot about how awesome all our kids are out in high school. 

SBC: What’s something that you singularly bring to the school?

JD: The personal connection piece is something that I bring. I think every kid that has graduated from here can think of good talks that we have had together or good experiences that we've shared together. And that they have always known that I'm on their side. Like I really think every kid could say that. Even kids who we butted heads a lot or if things were challenging, like I think in the end, to just know that you have a teacher who's on your side is pretty deep. 

SBC: Yeah that frames every relationship. Coming back to make sure that they know that always.

JD: And I think especially in middle school when a lot of parents start to feel like what the hell is happening to my kid? You know, like what's going on? To be able to partner with teachers to be like, this is normal. You know we have so many meetings with parents where they're like, oh, thank you so much for seeing what's going on and helping me. Because it's such a big transition, because the kids are pushing their parents away. That's their job. It's to become who they're gonna be. And it really freaks some parents out and it's really hard. You go from having a cuddly little buddy to somebody who slams the door and is like, leave me alone, I need to be alone. And you're like oh. So I love that opportunity too, to be able to partner with parents.

SBC: How do you know that it's been a good day of teaching? What does that look like, feel like? 

JD: I love when I've heard every kid's voice, like when we're talking about a book. And I love it when I don't know when class is over. You know that's been a good class.

SBC: Like you lost track of time.

JD: You lost track of time, nobody's been like, oh it's lunch time. Like they're all revved. I guess sometimes you know the next day, because somebody will be talking about something you did the day before. This winter, I taught Romeo and Juliet for the first time, and it was so successful. You know when a thing is going well, is when the kids come into class, they're like ready to go, they're, like, what are we doing today? Like, are we gonna get to do that scene? Like, I brought my wig. You can tell they've been thinking about it outside of class. I think you know it's good when it spills over to other parts of the day. Because then it's real, and they're really thinking about it.

SBC: When they leave, when they graduate, what is the one thing that you hope that they know? 

JD: I hope they know that they can ask for help. Doing whatever they're doing in their life. I hope they know that. I honestly feel like that's the biggest thing, that they can be vulnerable and put themselves out there and ask for help. And be themselves. Yeah, and be their freaky, awesome selves. 

SBC: That's great.  Thank you very much. 

JD: Thank you.

This interview has been condensed and edited from its original form. 

SC: Ruth Charney, what is your relationship to the Center School? 

RC: Well, I was one of the six initial founders. And I was a parent, my children went there. I taught for, oh, I don't know, maybe 20 years there, starting out with the Primes, or seven and eight year olds, and then really finding my niche with the older kids, with the Uppers. And particularly being able to focus on things that I love teaching, which were literature and writing. But also I loved the sense of community that I think we all created. 

SBC: How did you do that? How did you create that sense of community? 

RC: We worked hard. I think it was a combination of creating a curriculum that we thought would help us build the kind of community we wanted, articulate that community, and work together to enact it. 

SBC: What was essential in creating that curriculum? Like was there a driving question? 

RC: You know, I'm remembering when we were sitting on a cold winter night trying to talk about what we wanted to build, that we thought we didn't see elsewhere in other classrooms. We just didn't think it was easy to come by. And it was a question of, I remember somebody phrasing it as: we know how to teach kids to read. But do we know how to teach them to be good people? 

SBC: That was there from the beginning, huh? 

RC: That was there from the beginning. And I think by good people, we didn't necessarily mean obedient or follow the rules all the time. I think we meant the ability to, I think, we framed it as take care of themselves, each other, and their environment. 

SBC: So the starting of the school was because you were like, I don't see what I feel like is possible in teaching.

RC: I think, again, we all understood that in order to integrate what we called a social curriculum with an academic curriculum, we wanted to see how it progressed. We wanted time and we felt like we would have to somehow have some control over school. It couldn't be an add-on in a school. We wanted to see if we could generate it from the time kids were young as they grew up through middle school. 

SBC: That's interesting. What was it about that seventh and eighth grade developmental state that really drew you in? 

RC: I think it was the capacity for dialogue. And the capacity to see how kids could really embrace a culture and a community. I remember someone came in seventh grade, so they were new to the classroom, and they started to tease someone because they made a mistake. And one of their classmates turned to them and said, “we don't do that here.” But to see you guys, when you were students, hold that community, by then you had embraced, most of you had embraced them, not 100%. At times people tested and at times people struggled. But you had really, I think, internalized a lot of what you had learned over the years. 

SBC: How did you approach struggling students at that age?

RC: To problem-solve together, to name the struggle. I think we had to have faith. I think kids had to have faith in us that we knew them. And so when I would say to someone, to you or to one of the other kids, I know this is frustrating, I know this is hard, I also know you can do it. And you gotta do it, they believed. If they didn't believe that I knew them, if they didn' believe when I said I know you could do it, they probably would have resisted or would have shut down or it would have become a power struggle. 

But I think it was clear then, that we were on the same side and that doesn't come out of nowhere. That comes out of a curriculum that's building that kind of relationship.

SBC: How would you recognize that a day was successful? What did you see in students or what did you feel? What made you feel like, oh, something happened today? 

RC: There's probably many answers to that, but I was thinking about how... It was sort of my habit at some point at the end of the day, I would review in my head the kids I had spoken to, something they had done each day. And I would often notice who I forgot, who I hadn't spoken to. Who I had made no connection with. And sometimes it made me feel very bad. It was a kind of habit that at least gave me a chance the next day. 

SBC: Are there any more rituals that stick out to you?

RC: I think Morning Meeting was the anchor. I mean, it's a daily ritual. It made a place for laughter and tears. And helping us all learn how to respond to each other. It was work where someone who wasn't popular or wasn't well known by other kids would share something and the room could go silent. And so we had to be there to say that doesn't work. To have people understand that it was expected that you respond to people who aren't your best friends. 

Also, if someone came in with something that was heartbreaking, it could go silent, unless you learn what things you can say when somebody says, my grandmother is sick, or my puppy was run over. It wasn't what kind of car ran him over? It was how do you deal with those hard moments. 

SBC: What’s the origin story of the Morning Meeting? 

RC: Origin story... I think we all came from places where the day began with a circle, as teachers. What we didn't come from, what we began to generate was that the Morning Meeting, would become a ritual of four different components. I mean I remember when I was teaching seven and eight-year-olds and I would stand by the door and say “hello” and that kids were just walking in with their heads down at their toes, and nobody said “hello” back. And so somewhere in there I said, we have to begin our morning meeting with greetings. 

SBC: Oh interesting. I love that. 

RC: And we've had all kinds of ways that people have greeted each other across the circle. Opera songs, or I mean, crazy ways and serious ways. 

I mean, so the power of looking at somebody and saying hello to them and sharing various ways of saying hello, standing up, walking across a circle, shaking someone's hand… And I can remember some of our very, very quiet kids who had said that the only time I heard someone say my name was in Morning Meetings.

SBC: What was your favorite Center School song?

RC: My favorite Center School song… some of them I still hear and I start to tear up. 

SBC: Oh, yeah. 

RC: River was a big one. 

SBC: I sang that to Eligh when he was a baby to get him to fall asleep. What was your favorite  GCS birthday song?

RC: Oh gosh, I always loved Joyful. Rock and Roll birthday was the one the kids always wanted. Loved it. 

The Woods Primes practice of portraiture -- of seeing and honoring themselves and others -- has also become a meaningful way to mark special moments and guests. These students have used their developing skills to create portraits of visitors and school founders as a gesture of welcome and appreciation. Read more about this practice here and here.

SBC: Is there anything that you feel like you developed or contributed to the school that still remains? 

RC: I wish I knew the school better in some ways. I think that there still is a real sense of belonging that's very powerful there. And when I went recently to see the celebration for Charlie, I was struck with what a brilliant audience the children were. 

I mean, it was maybe an hour and a half, two hours, whatever. And nobody was… I mean there was no chatter. There was no fidgeting. There was not disruption. They were interested. And somehow that sense of being able to stretch children. And give them a sense of respect and honor even. I think that's still very much a part of it. 

It's very hard to see that in other places. That expectation of self-control, of paying attention, when other things are going on. I mean a lot of it was way above some of the little ones' heads, but they weren't unhappy. They were enjoying watching what was going on. And it wasn't on their level. It wasn't geared to them. It wasn't funny games. It was a way of saying thank you to another adult, someone that they knew and probably admired. And yes, they were experiencing this ceremony and this ritual and they felt part of it. And having them see it and know how to behave through it, I think are some of the very essentials of social curriculum. 

SBC: Beautiful. Are you still in touch with students? 

RC: I wish I had done that better. I love being in touch with students. I don't have a regular way to do that. I didn't set up something that was a regular way to do it. So I feel when it happens, It's always very warm and very affecting and means a lot. These shared memories are very precious to me too. 

SBC: Yeah, me too. Thank you so much Ruth.

RC: Thank you, Sara.