A Parent’s Guide to Surviving Middle School

Dear Center School Families,

At last week’s parent coffee, a group of us found ourselves swapping stories about what our own middle school years were like. As you might imagine, the memories were wide-ranging: some made us laugh, others made us cringe, and a few reminded us just how much those years shaped who we became. The conversation brought me back to an article from The Atlantic, “A Parent’s Guide to Surviving Middle School,” that came out last year, one I still think about often. I wanted to share it with our broader community because it captures so well what makes this stage of life both challenging and extraordinary.

When I was teaching middle schoolers, people would often say to me, sometimes with a laugh and sometimes with a look of horror, “Wow, I could never do that.” I always understood what they meant. Middle school has a reputation for being messy, emotional, and unpredictable. And yes, all of that is true. But what’s also true is that it’s one of the most remarkable stages of human development.

Middle schoolers are in the middle of a real metamorphosis. They’re caught between childhood and adolescence, pulled toward independence but still comforted by being cared for. They’re asking big questions about who they are and how they fit into the wider world. They’re experimenting in all sorts of ways, and when the environment is right, they can astonish you with their empathy, curiosity, and humor.

Too often, we don’t give this stage the resources or attention it deserves. Early childhood and elementary years are celebrated as foundations, and high school is framed as preparation for “the real world.” Middle school can get cast as something to endure rather than something to invest in. But the truth is, these years are pivotal. It’s when students begin building the habits of mind, heart, and character that will carry them forward. It’s when they start to learn how to think critically, advocate for themselves, work through conflict, and hold onto joy even when life feels complicated.

At our school, we see middle school as an opportunity, not an obstacle. We create space for students to wrestle with ideas, to try and fail and try again, to explore passions and discover new ones. We believe these years are not only important but transformative, and we’re committed to walking alongside students as they make that transformation.

So when someone says, “I could never do that,” my response is: I wouldn’t want to do anything else.

Warmly,

Lauren Obregón

Interim Co-Head of School